conviction

In the name of God, the Most Merciful, the Most Compassionate.

I’m a podcast guy. There is something about the minimalism of audio that appeals to me. More than any other format the warmth of the human voice in open dialogue welcomes an invitation to the bearing of intimacy across distance. It feels deeply personal and honest in the way that visual media can detract from due to its performative bias.

For a while, Brother Ali’s Travelers Podcast has been a favourite of mine. I’ve enjoyed his interviews with Hip Hop artists, creatives and comedians, but his introspective monologues during Ramadan - mostly unstructured reflections on Islam - have been some of his finest. The penultimate episode in the series is titled “The Truest Thing I know”. In it he beautifully lays out one of the most resonant descriptions of its essence that I’ve heard communicated, mirroring many of my personal feelings towards its universality and what it calls humanity to when understood unburdened by poorly contextualised readings and curated caricatures. But before anything, as a seeker in an era of confusion, the title alone - “The Truest Thing I know” - left such a powerful imprint on my mind, I was awe-struck by the depth of conviction that the statement holds.

Conviction is the grandfather of confidence. It’s the deep in the bones faith; marrow-rich, resting an eye-lash shy of certainty, but still immovably content. It’s not wild or blind like the confidence of youth, seeking identity in its affirmations. Conviction has wisdom on its side. Battle-tested and weathered by doubts, it’s seen birth, death, wealth and poverty, and with a calloused soul made peace with it all.

For those who yearn for truth, and are called to unity, life can appear to be a series of seductions. Beauty can be gleamed in every direction; a glittering gem stealing glances from the corners of your eyes. When you take one step towards the glow, another vies for your attention, to which you feel obliged; propelled by fear of missing what might provide the sensation of clarity, no matter how fleeting. We’re in perpetual motion between junctures yet remain no closer to home.

Today I’m a wayfarer, but if nothing else, in possession of a map. Hopefully, a little less susceptible to the false idols as they parade themselves in shadows, luminous only to who has killed their desire to taste true light, uninterrupted in splendour. All else fading.

La Ilaha Illallah

There is no god but Allah

Every idea is subordinate to this reality and as such we hold them in their rightful positions, not clinging or expectant of them to fill a God-shaped void. Not hungry for argumentation or debate, mainstream acceptance, influencer endorsement, or recognition by those whose hearts are numbed to its reasoning faculties, cynical to a fault. Unwavered by the zeitgeist and the plasticity of its nature, mouldable by whomever yields the right resource: whether slow coercion or blunt force.

Conviction isn’t a burden inherited from ancestors who through death became beyond reproach or beneath reverence. You cultivate it in yourself everyday, alive and in tact, informing your being and engaging all senses.

"There will come a time when holding on to your Deen will be like holding on to hot coals" - Prophet Muhammad ﷺ

It’s not difficult to make the case that we’re living in such times, but the circumstances are not unique. Qur’anically, Abraham (as) is the archetypal figure for focused belief in the Source of creation in the midst of a community set on venerating stone objects of their own making. We’ve made gods of politicians, artists, athletes, scholars, technologists; but even more degrading is the gods we’ve made out of products and ideologies (unbridled materialism, power hunger, nationalism); worshipped at the altar of our devices.

Conviction today, as it was for Abraham, is to look upon the stone figures and reject their divinity, even as everyone around you prostrates and offers sacrifices. It’s to hold them to their appropriate regard but be mindful that our orientation is towards the Source of all that is, and whatever detracts from this is false. Conviction is to refuse to become a stranger to yourself, with hollowed insides and no discernment between true humanity and the discarded shell that keeps up appearances.

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